On Wednesday we had swimming lessons right after school and then the boys convinced me that we should go to McDonalds. I wanted to resist, because really what is there to like? I don’t care for the burgers, I don’t love the ambiance, I’m not a huge fan of the play structures enclosed like chicken coops… But I agreed. Because by the time we left the pool, it was dinner time and there was nothing ready at home. My options were (a) to go home with two tired, hungry boys and have them entertain themselves (aka fight with each other) while throwing together something only marginally more nutritious than a Happy Meal, like maybe grilled cheese sandwiches, or (b) to go to McDonalds and have dinner made for us and enjoy their happy faces and joyful playing in the aforementioned chicken coop. So I opted for the latter and I did not regret it. I fed them carrot sticks on the way to appease my conscience and them jumped into the fast food experience.

The boys each ordered a Happy Meal, one with apple slices, one with yoghurt (good additions, right?) and then ran off to play, shrieking with glee. I found a chicken burger with guacamole that sounded bearable and sat down to watch them. They climbed and laughed and made new friends and came running at the smell of chicken nuggets. They ate with enthusiasm and big smiles. They tore open their toys and squealed at the silly dino who can stick out his tongue. It was all exuberance and fun and play. Then they ran off again, making more friends, spinning, doing tricks with dino.

For my part, I managed two conversations that each lasted a full five minutes, all while watching the boys and smiling and waving at their antics. I was relaxed, they were happy. And that is why I don’t regret the less than stellar nutrition of our meals or perhaps questionable hygiene of the play area. Because we all relaxed and had fun. We even had a long chat about the day and all the things we had done and shared some jokes. They were elated that they had got their choice, and that joy was contagious. We came home tired and happy, ready for stories and snuggles.

I’m not saying I want to make this a regular thing, but the lesson for me was that there is a place for McDonalds. And short cuts in general. Or trade offs. No one can do it all, all the time. Of course it doesn’t have to be McDonalds, or even have anything to do with food. Maybe we trade wearing shoes, for brushing our hair somedays. Or picking up toys for having a bath. On Wednesday, I traded healthy, fresh, home cooked food for a relaxed family. I wasn’t stressed about getting food on the table, so instead I could just have fun with my kids. I was a better mom because I made a ‘questionable’ choice. I didn’t shout. They didn’t fight. We all just played. That worked for us. And I think more unsuper trade offs are in our future. I spend a lot of time organizing toys and books and art supplies, and choosing and buying preparing food, and reading endless articles about parenting… These are all worthwhile endeavors in the quest for being a better parent and taking good care of the kids, until they take the place of actually being with the kids and really listening to them and just seeing who they are. So I think that means more play time for me!